For Better or Worse. It's that new show on TLC where the family and friends plan a wedding FOR the couple with a $5000 budget. This one that I'm watching has Captain Bitch for a wedding planner. Now, granted this woman has to constantly fight off the demands of these people who do not understand that $5000 is NOT $30,000, but there is a difference between being firm and just being a bitch. She's such a fucking bitch that I cannot even believe someone hasn't slapped her up to this point. Now, these hired people, or I guess the hired person is just the wedding planner, they're trying to make a TV show, not a wedding. If they were concerned with class, they would end up with the same damn show, so they have to spice things up. They have just selected a hot pink dress for the bride. I'm sorry, not even a splash of white. I wouldn't even pick that dress for a 1987 prom, much less for a wedding. I don't care how funky this couple is. I think they should rename this show "Half-Ass Bullshit Wedding for Camera Whores." Yeah, this is me not feeling bad for these people at all because who the fuck does this to their most special day of their lives? They deserve what they get. They put all these decisions in the hand of a TV show, and they compromise the wishes of the couple to be on TV.

I just watched her reaction. She's not happy with the dress. Well, why the fuck should she be? It's HOT PINK!!! The girl comments the camera about the bride seeing the dress, "I think she wanted to cry at first, but she trusts us and knows we wouldn't put her in a position she wouldn't be comfortable with." I'm sorry, did I miss a step? She trusted you to pick out a white dress and you didn't. What is she supposed to trust other than that?

Also, she looks like a funky Anne Heche. It's weird. You should see this.

I feel like shit. I took a nap from 8:30pm to 9:30pm. You are not supposed to nap at those hours on a Saturday night. You're just completely confused after that. You feel even more tired. It's 10:30pm now and it feels like 3am.

I did okay last night at work. I made decent money, but I made more the first time I worked when it was freezing out and there was half the crowd. For some reason, this Friday night crowd was a bit...cranky. I don't know, I mean there were a few nice people, but overall, it didn't even seem like people were out to have fun. Everyone was just sort of cold, sort of lame, sort of not tipping. Again, there were exceptions, but it was a frustrating evening.

But alas, it is raining today, so work was called off once again. I created a budget for myself for this move, and this not working because of the rain thing going on is seriously hurting my plans. I know it's just the beginning of the summer, but there really aren't that many weekends before I move. I'm trying not to think about it.

I'm trying not to panic about a lot of things. I've come to a whole bunch of decisions recently about the move. For one, I'm shipping my belongings, not driving them. I'm going to be selling my bed and buying a new one. (So, if any of you out there are interested in a queen-size, firm bed with box frame and iron frame that is all in absolutely perfect condition and was the place I rested my head for two years...I'll be throwing that puppy on ebay at the end of the summer. Don't know who would buy it, but it's better than putting it on corner. It's a damn good bed too. Like new. I'll be posting that later. I'll me selling my computer too. I should have done that forever ago.

I think the Sandra and Alvin (or Elvin?) are the worst couple in the world. (Cosby Show). They are just horrible. He's such a fucking wimp. She's so whiny and bland. They fight over the stupidest shit. Also, am I supposed to believe Sandra and Vanessa are sisters? Really? And Denise? I think their Claire had an affair with a white man for her first two children.

Much later...

You know what's sad? When you don't have anyone to talk to. It's now 3:30am, and I'm wide awake. I don't know why that is, but I'm thinking of blaming my one hour late night nap. So, not only am I not tired, I'm not in the mood to be tired. Yeah, I'm up and ready to go out, ready to do something. Obviously, there isn't much I'm going to do, and obviously I'm not going out. I DO want to talk though. I feel like talking on the phone, and I feel like once you get me on the phone, I'll talk all goddamn night without coming up for air, but alas there is not a soul to talk to. I've called the handful of people who you can call at 3:30am, but they either didn't pick up or they're out having fun without me. I turned off the TV, thinking maybe the TV was what was keeping me up, but instead I was lying there in the dark, wishing I had someone to talk to. Don't you hate it when you feel like you have so much to say but there's no one to listen? And no, I don't feel like writing here. I feel like talking to a human being. Someone I know, someone who knows me well. Someone who's easy to laugh with.

I can't decide on a temperature either. When I have the air conditioning on, I'm freezing. I just turned it off, and now I'm literally sweating.

Ugh, I'm going to go.