This issue of there being nothing that a girl can't do that a guy can: Look, I believe in wanting something bad enough to get it, and I believe in the power of teamwork. I believe (like I said in the case of Ruthie) that when you take control of your mind, you can push yourself beyond your own physical limitations. I believe that there are MANY things that a woman does MUCH better than a man. I believe that women have powers that are unique to women, and men have powers that are unique to men.

Men and women are NOT the same. There is a reason why we are created as two separate sexes. There is a reason why we are not all identical to each other. Each holds varying strengths. Men know that they need us, and we do need men. It takes both for our entire species of humanity to exist. Women can emote, we can recognize and sympathize better generally. We have greater endurance. It is OUR gender that has been trusted to keeping babies from conception to nine months, when they are not even strong enough to exist in the world. We are good at nurturing. We are good at multi-tasking. The list goes on and on, and if you want to learn more, please watch Discovery Channel's special called "Science of the Sexes." It is beyond fascinating. My point is, I don't think we're weaker or stronger. We are different. Unfortunately, I don't believe that many of our greater points can be portrayed in an entertaining way for a half hour show. We live longer, but how do you fit our life spans into BOTS?

Anyway, I appreciate Ellen and Ruthie's optimism by saying that we can do anything that guys can do, but I don't really see it so much as optimism, but more as delusional. Again, allow me to stress that we cannot do everything they can do, nor can they do everything we can do.

Laser tag. It's not the arguing. It's not our lack of strategy. It's fucking laser tag. You can take the Female Laser Tag Olympic Team and put them up against a bunch of 8 year old boys, and who will win? THE EIGHT YEAR OLD BOYS!!!!

Melissa is right. I don't play with guns all growing up. I don't play video games everyday from when I was 2 to present day. I called RK from Jamaica and told him what the mission was that day, and he laughed. "There's NO WAY the girls can win that. NO way." I was not offended. It was a fact. I don't care if you're well-versed in Laser tag. Bullshit. We're losing this. When it was announced, we started laughing and suggested that we just give the guys the prizes so we didn't have to go through the formality of actually doing the mission.

So, we suit up. First of all, the girls are too small for the equipment. One run across the floor and my elbow pads are dangling from my wrists, and my knee pads are swinging around my ankles. It's pretty ridiculous, and sort of funny.

Ayanna decides to take over. Okay, this wasn't portrayed very clearly. Ayanna is NOT giving us a strategy AT ALL. She is just talking. She's talking, she's talking, she's talking, but she's not saying a damn thing. Did you hear her? "We're chickens. We're lambs, and we need to get a lamb and bring out the wolves. It's like in Neverending Story, when he's running through the fields. You know, we gotta take it over. We gotta have strategy because the essence of strategy.." and on and on and on and on. WHAT???? What are you SAYING? So, Melissa and I cut her off. "Okay, just tell me what the strategy is and we'll do it."

"I'm telling you we have to have a plan. See the boys have a plan. They are the wolves..."

"Okay, look we don't have any time. Just tell us what to do."

"I'm saying that without strategy, we got nothing."

This went on and on. She was not saying a damn thing. We tried to come up with a plan, but we had none. The guys plan was pretty easy. They were faster than us. Their plan was to stay on their side shooting until there were only a few seconds left, and they'd run over to the other side. We'd have to start running toward them earlier because we weren't as fast. So, they got us. It's pretty full-proof. Again, there was nothing we could do. We couldn't get to our safety zone fast enough.

All this crap about how we should have listened to Ayanna and now she's leaving because we're such a shitty team - it's complete bullshit and really annoying to me.

Then Emily makes a statement about who we need to work as a time. That's rich. What was that, Emily? What team again? The one you've been tearing apart with your claws because of your high school hang-ups and your boyfriend's sexual history? Last time I checked, you weren't worried about the "team."

So, Ayanna doesn't "quit," she "chooses to leave." Now, that's just too easy. Okay, let's see what Webster's dictionary has to say about this:

v. quit, or quit·ted (kwtd) quit·ting, quits
v. tr.
1. To depart from; leave: “You and I are on the point of quitting the theater of our exploits” (Horatio Nelson).
2. To leave the company of: had to quit the gathering in order to be home by midnight.
3. To give up; relinquish: quit a job.
4. To abandon or put aside; forsake: advised them to quit their dissipated ways.
5. To cease or discontinue: asked them to quit talking; quit smoking.
6. Computer Science. To exit (an application).
7. To rid oneself of by paying: quit a debt.
8. To release from a burden or responsibility.
9. To conduct (oneself) in a specified way: Quit yourselves like adults.

I think the very first definition sums up what Ayanna was saying. Second one as well. Ayanna quit to me. She didn't like it there? Who did? We're fucking miserable. Guys too. We're done. But we stick it out.

The fight Anne gets in with Ayanna: Ayanna was in the wrong, if you ask me. She's pretending to be "all cool" when Ruthie is trying to get them to talk. Anne wasn't mad, but Ayanna was annoyed because Anne started laughing when Ayanna was taking her chicken/lamb/wolf reference TOO far before it started. Anne goes to say that we tried hard and that it's not her fault, and Ayanna goes and accuses her. "You said it, I didn't." That's way to third grade for me to even talk about without vomiting. So, Anne confronts her, and Ayanna is saying she didn't say anything. Then she won't talk or listen - hypocritically. Made my blood boil.

When she left, she made her goodbye speech to every single person there, but left me and Anne out of it. Anne was rolling her eyes that she would make that kind of statement, and I was confused why I was dragged in the mud. Because I was close with Anne maybe? Who knows, but it pissed me off. So, I didn't bother saying goodbye to her. She excluded me for one reason or another that I don't know of, and it wasn't worth it to me to find out why.

Side note: Colin's comparison to Emily being shot in the back vs. Emily "stabbing" Rachel in the back. Well, that was pretty much brilliant. That's all I can say on that.

We're losing a lot. Not good.

Next week is my favorite mission. Spidermon. SO FUN.

I don't have much else to say on this one. It's pretty clear and there were no fun back stories.