James vs. Shane. To me, there is no competition here...but we'll get into that later, let's just talk about the episode as we go...

It's starting off with James and Shane laying down the situation for us: James has the lowest points. His interview clip is SO strange. "Every guy...is...focused...on........points." What the hell is wrong with him? I think this is the interview after he was voted off. I think there has been drinking and a lot crying because, seriously, how fucked up does he look? He looks like he's been beaten before he went in there. Emily says that he's built for competition. In my opinion, being psychotically competitive is NOT the same as being built for competition. Personally, I can only handle being in the presence of good sports (good winners as well as good losers, and he is none of these.)

Melissa is looking particularly good in this scene. Her hair is just amazing. "Dude, I'll humiliate myself. I need 50 G's." Great line.

The Human Aquarium. Getting to this mission took forever. Obviously, they can never explain to us what the hold up is exactly, so we just meet up at some ungodly morning hour, and then we sit around all day until the mission finally begins. The Hurry-Up-And-Wait. You may have heard this before. Well apparently, there was some problem with the tank, and then by the time they fixed it, it was too dark, so then it took more time to set up lights. I don't know, this is what they tell me. So, we get there and there are five or six of these kids with red shirts standing by the sign with this light shooting up on their faces like kids do with flashlights when they're telling a ghost story. I can't even tell you what their purpose was. I don't know why they were there, why they needed all of them to judge. I think it's really random, and I'm sure you agree.

So, we learn of the rules. I'm sorry, but worst mission ever. I complained once again about it being unfair between guys and girls. The girls all floated to the top, but I'm not going to go into it because Antoine is a small guy. Even so, he weighs at least 30 lbs more than the girls. I'm too tired to complain about it though. It sucked.

That fish between our legs that we had to hold - no point. Too dumb. Also, those snorkels sucked. I've been snorkeling my whole life without a problem. I used to go snorkeling twice a year. Why all of a sudden was there water coming into my mouth piece? As soon as I laid back, water flooded in. Never had that happen to me before, but today, it did. And that is one prize I really wanted to win.

Emily was SO pissed about this mission. As you can see, she got out really early, and she cursed and bitched about how unfair it was that the girls would float up faster. That's how I got out. I took a deep breath and my whole body rose to the surface. Apparently, when Emily got up, she made this huge wave that put water right into Colin's snorkel and got him out. He says so too, but it's not clear.

Ellen made me laugh in this. When she gets out and her expression, "That sucks, what did I do?" I thought she looked adorable. Also, are we noticing that even after lying in that sea water, Ellen's hair is absolutely perfect? It's all full, straight, moves like a Pantene commercial. So unfair.

Those sea creatures - so stupid. This mission went on for so long that they ran out of creatures to throw on them. So, we sat around for HOURS. I couldn't believe how bored I was.

Jamie is just a comedic genius in this episode, do you agree? He named is sea urchins! That's just hysterical.

I'm glad there is finally an episode to illustrate the humor and personality of Jamie and Antoine. Antoine is so animated and so articulate and so unique. It's been a shame that he hasn't played a bigger role in this show.

Shane gets out. We need to talk about what REALLY happened here. THIS is how Shane got out: He farted in the tank, and the bubbling up made him laugh, so the water came into his mask and he had to sit up. Now, WHY oh WHY would they NOT include this in the show? It's the best thing that has ever happened.

James was freaking out in there. Antoine was having the time of his life. I swear to God, at one point, he fell asleep. How scary to wake up to that? Anyway, he was laughing, and calling James names, and James was miserable. So, he flipped out, jumped out of the water and screamed that it was the worst mission he ever had to do in his life.

Life in Jamaica was pretty good at this point. No fighting, as you see. We were all getting pretty close, having a lot of laughs. Granted, this losing thing was just no fun - but outside of that, it was great. We were going out to dinners, we were having a lot of laughs. This was the time in Jamaica that I enjoyed the most.

The guys have a tie. Great TV. Finally, the guys have a real issue to deal with, and I liked how you can see the arguments for both sides. Now, I would think they'd pick James, though I don't think it would be the right decision. I think James is a loose cannon - and Shane is a hard worker with a calm mind. I HATE how James says that he should be the one to stay. I just don't like it, because you don't see Shane saying that. I think it's lame. I could never say, "I should stay over you." Still, I think James took the news really well. Ironically, he seems to be great sport about it. And then Emily leans over and says, "I think this changes my decision to stay." First off - decision to stay? We're not deciding to stay here...we are here trying to win. Not succeeding, but still fucking trying.

Let's talk about this because we JUST have to. Emily has admittedly sabotaged SEVERAL of the strongest girls on our team. She voted off Rachel who we all know is pure power and positivity. She got rid of Veronica who wanted to stay so badly, who busted her ass to do well. Emily RUINED these girls chances here, these girls that we NEEDED on our team because SHE wanted to fight off her competition so she could be in the final 3. Then, when most of our strongest girls are sent home - she fucking QUITS with THREE MISSIONS TO GO!!! She did her best to break up our team, and then she decides to abandon us because she doesn't want to be here without her boyfriend. Could it be because you haven't made ANY friends here after all your malicious actions? If she was voted off from the beginning, there would be team unity and some kick ass strong players on our team. Not that there aren't strong players, but it doesn't take a genius to see that Rachel and Veronica absolutely kick my ass.

Hey, I'm holding my own, I know - but I also know when there are better, stronger competitors than me, and those girls were sent home. My family and friends from home tell me that part of the game was the social aspect of it, not just the physical, and since I played THAT right, and did consistently average on all my missions, that's why I was still there. Going into this challenge, I knew that my discomfort with conflict and my ability to not take shit too seriously would be one of the key elements to my staying in the game. If you do okay but just okay, then you have good points, but no one is threatened. If you don't go LOOKING for fights and conflicts and sides to be on during personally issues, and you sit around having a good time and getting a tan - no one wants to get rid of you. I think it's a combination of that with a little luck that kept me there. But I have to tell you, I didn't think I'd stay so long. I was sure I'd be gone after the first week.

But I digress...what Emily did was really lame, and we all know that. Every single thing she did there was completely selfish, and again, that's just a huge disappointment because that girl was just really, really nice to me. I mean, if she didn't have the the passion to be there and fight until the end, if she didn't WANT the prize that badly, then why not just fucking leave and let people who DO care have that chance? Part of me wonders if it's related to her insecurity about James being around the "beautiful girls with bikini tops." Maybe she wanted to quit, but James being "built for competition" would never quit, so she HAD to stay to keep an eye on him. When he got voted, there was then no need to stay. Before that though, she had to do well to make sure that she didn't get voted off before him since she knew he wouldn't leave if she did get voted off. So, she wasn't trying to stay in the inner circle to win the game. She was just trying to stay in Jamaica to keep a short leash on her boyfriend. Hmm...now, I'm not saying this is true at all - but it's a theory. I think it's a good one, if you don't mind me saying so.

Next week - SCARY fucking mission.