Starts off with Rachel “being teased” by Coral and Nicole. Okay, this is all wrong here. I was there. It was FUNNY. Rachel did get upset, but we thought it was all in fun. This scene is one of the hardest I laughed the whole time I was there. This Rachel-as-victim speech she’s giving in her interview does not refer to this scene in particular all that much at all. Rachel didn’t do ONE THING to help out for their focus group. It even made me mad a little, and I’m not in her group. Coral and Nicole were being playful here. And for me, I was sitting in one of those chairs laughing to the point where my stomach hurt. It was not at all what you think.

I’m not talking about this Outkast situation. I’m not doing it again. I talked about it at length in the Real World book, and if you want to know what I thought, then go buy the book and read it.

I do want to say that I thought Coral and Nicole would be mad if we spoke up for them at work because I thought they would think it was unprofessional of me to talk for them. They make big deals about not being spoken for. However, it turned into them thinking we were bad friends. Ugh, major miscommunication that really fucking sucked.

The girls didn’t like work. I was relatively indifferent. The boys loved it. If I got into it and tried to love it, I was afraid of the girls making fun of me. I know, it’s childish of me. It’s like those kids in class that make it cool to hate school, and anyone who likes it is a total nerd and brown-noser. I thought maybe we could all have fun if we tried liking it, but the girls were set on hating it, and I just went along like a pathetic, dependent loser. (I don’t have much backbone until I really need it.)

I hated that night when the boys just bitched to me about the girls. To me, it was just as negative. They hardly let me get a word in. I did defend the girls though. Of course, the editors didn’t show it. I wanted to explain to the boys where Coral was coming from, but I didn’t want to say too much about why she is the way she is because she shared her stories and history with me as a friend, and it wasn’t my place to tell anyone else. I just told the boys that she has a good heart and doesn’t dick around with half-ass friendships. She is very selective because she doesn’t want to get hurt like she’s been hurt before. You just got to break through some tough layers to get to the sweetheart inside.

In the beginning, Coral wasn’t the nicest person to people who called on the phone. She sounded really annoyed with anyone who called. She warmed up by the end. Just took a little time.

I hear what Rachel was saying to Nicole. Nicole and Coral burn bridges if they’re upset. They just cut people off if they feel betrayed by them. Sometimes the “betrayal” is not that dramatic or is just caused by a miscommunication, but if you cut the person off, you never learn that. Sometimes it was like walking on eggshells in that house. People got mad when I wouldn’t expect them too.

I don’t burn bridges EVER. Never burned one. If I discover that a friend is not trustworthy, then it’s what I call “friendship in moderation.” I just know that that person will not be a soulmate, but it doesn’t mean that I have to stop having them as a friend. Not everyone can be a perfect friend, but it doesn’t mean they don’t have something wonderful to offer that you can enjoy and learn from. That’s me. With Coral and Nicole, I was terrified of fucking up somehow and making a mistake that would push them away. They were intimidating because they had very strict rules on friends. I’ve never had anyone in my life like that, and it was hard to work through that aspect which was so unlike myself. That’s all I feel like saying on that.